Took a trip today to Crystal Mall for some slop at lunch and it was one of the worst experiences of my life.
First, the parking. The underground parking lot is set up weird, kinda like a European round about. Insert a bunch of bad drivers in a round a bout you have a recipe for trouble. We were lucky to find a spot real quick and ended up privy to an argument over a parking spot, where two men were yelling and pushing at each other, it almost broke into a fight, I quickly interjected and somehow it dissolved. It was weird cause they all got good parking spots but one guy felt he should have got his choice of the two.
Second, the seating. There was a lack of seating in the mall. Our food took about 20 mins to get ready so I managed to find a seat but I also became the guardian of the table. I had to fend off person after person speaking to me in Cantonese and once I had to chase a guy down who just decided it was OK to take the chair. I am not Chinese and had to communicate mostly with awkward hand signals.
Once we finished the meal, and I stood up and someone was quick to take my chair, it felt like playing musical chairs and battling for a seat when the music stops. I literally just stood up and my knees were not even fully extended and someone was already sitting in my chair, I could feel her knees against mine. I could have gave her a lap dance we were so close.
Third, the music. It was a long sitting for mall food and we were close to the speaker where Cantonese music was blaring, after about an hour of this high volume music it was about all I could take. It was louder than a table at dim sum with a microphone. After one hour they didn't even play one Andy Lau track, lol.
Fourth, the food was flavourless but I liked my iced lemon tea.