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Took a trip today to Crystal Mall for some slop at lunch and it was one of the worst experiences of my life.

First, the parking. The underground parking lot is set up weird, kinda like a European round about. Insert a bunch of bad drivers in a round a bout you have a recipe for trouble. We were lucky to find a spot real quick and ended up privy to an argument over a parking spot, where two men were yelling and pushing at each other, it almost broke into a fight, I quickly interjected and somehow it dissolved. It was weird cause they all got good parking spots but one guy felt he should have got his choice of the two.

Second, the seating. There was a lack of seating in the mall. Our food took about 20 mins to get ready so I managed to find a seat but I also became the guardian of the table. I had to fend off person after person speaking to me in Cantonese and once I had to chase a guy down who just decided it was OK to take the chair. I am not Chinese and had to communicate mostly with awkward hand signals.

Once we finished the meal, and I stood up and someone was quick to take my chair, it felt like playing musical chairs and battling for a seat when the music stops. I literally just stood up and my knees were not even fully extended and someone was already sitting in my chair, I could feel her knees against mine. I could have gave her a lap dance we were so close.

Third, the music. It was a long sitting for mall food and we were close to the speaker where Cantonese music was blaring, after about an hour of this high volume music it was about all I could take. It was louder than a table at dim sum with a microphone. After one hour they didn't even play one Andy Lau track, lol.

Fourth, the food was flavourless but I liked my iced lemon tea.

6 comments

Shov Shavantu said... @ October 26, 2008 at 10:17 PM

i've seen some weird stuff in that parking lot. there's one section where these chinese guys have setup some sort of gypsy camp and they detail cars and sell bootleg dvds. one of the chinese guys has no mouth. very creepy.

have you tried the famous soup dumpling place in that mall?

Gyromite said... @ October 26, 2008 at 10:34 PM

never did the dumpling place in Crysta; but there is a great xiao long bau place in Aberdeen mall in Richmond. That place is great.

I Love Food Blog said... @ October 27, 2008 at 9:00 PM

I have to agree with everything that Gyromite has said. A horrible experience indeed. I'll be posting my version of our visit to crystal mall soon. Be sure to check it out at:

http://ilovefoodblog.blogspot.com/

And I think you waited at least 30mins for your food.

fmed said... @ October 29, 2008 at 7:20 PM

At Crystal Mall: Wang's (for the XLB), S & W Pepper House (Sichuan) and Huaxi Noodle (for Sichuan and other regional Chinese food - try the Twice Cooked Pork) are great.

Most of the other places (especially the Cantonese and Taiwanese stalls) are mediocre....but Crystal Mall's food court is still comparitvely interesting for Chinese Food. But remember that this is Food Court food.

Richmond Public Market is another one to try (go to the Xin Jiang Halal Chinese place and the Tian Jiang Norther Chinese stalls The Malaysian stall is good too.) Aberdeen's is a bit Disney-fied....the Shanghai/XLB stall there isn't even in the running, IMO.

Gyromite said... @ October 30, 2008 at 12:21 AM

Fmed good to see you here. You are the XLB king!!!!!!!

Anonymous said... @ November 13, 2008 at 9:32 PM

you should try all food court chinese food
and other food court style spots not in food courts like the one on robson

december challenge
or best beef tongue dish in the city

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